Monday, 28 February 2011

What makes us want a furry companion?

During recent discussions and disagreements with the lover, it got me to thinking about what makes us want a pet. I want a dog, as badly as what I think is possible, the only thing holding me back is the fact that lover doesn't want one, and I'm not interested in owning a dog with a disgruntled partner. Why do I want a dog, multiple reasons really, the most compulsion comes from being an avid dog lover and wanting a loyal obedient friend to spend my days with. A furry buddy to take to the beach, take for walks and have cuddles with.

I also want a protector. There are those inevitable nights that I have to spend alone in this big creaky old house and I don't like the feeling of being alone, I want a pup that'll bark when something is wrong, and protect me if a seedy dude is in my yard. More than anything I want a cuddly companion that I can count on at all times - what with people hardly being 100% accountable anymore.

Of course lover is the voice of reason. We can't afford a dog, we could never go away, we'd have to walk it every day, toilet train it, pay for it to eat a mountain blah blah blah....

My rebuttle of course is that we never go away, walking is the fun part, toilet training is just while they're babies, sure we can afford it and food is just a necessity. So we don't have a dog. Just two cats that try their best to be goggies.

What are the reasons that people have dogs? Or cats even? Cats are easy to take care of and are still something to cuddle up next to at night when you're in bed alone. Dogs are cuddlier, offer a form of protection and alarm and a motivation for exercise. What else do we love about having pets? Why do so many people have dogs? There are a lot of them out there.

I want a boxer - as I'm sure I've mentioned before. What is it that makes different people want different dogs? Big dogs, small dogs, hairy dogs, hairless dogs, wrinkly dogs, ugly dogs, pretty dogs, preened dogs, scruffy dogs - what makes people want the different dogs you can get? What personality differences do they all have? I want a boxer because of their personality, that they could protect me if I need it - they are extremely loyal (as I presume most dogs are), and they are beautiful animals! It's hard to distinguish why so much but that is the only breed I'm honestly interested in.

What about you? Do you have a dog? Want one? Does your life change once you have one?

Oh and in answer to the 'we could never go away' lover's mumma owns a kennels - if that isn't prime then I have no idea what is :)

Caesar + Dhufish = A Delicious Dinner

How delicious does my dinner look? I hope your answer is f*cking DELICIOUS because that's what it tasted like. That huge fish pictured with the lover? Yeah that's what we ate tonight - jealous? Oh and my caesar salad was pretty much the best made - ever, yeah you better be jealous, I only wish I could eat this good every night.

I think I need to have like a little cookbook that I put in all my easy to cook recipes for dinner. I am not the kind of person who can come home after an 8 hour day and cook a delicious 3 course me for me and my fellow. So I need a compendium of deliciously simple recipes I can cook for my dinner - with about 21 recipes so I don't have to use the same one twice in a 3 week period. Mmmmm culinary heaven. Pretty sure the masterchefs would stab me for saying that that is all that culinary heaven consists of.

If you have a recipe to donate to my compendium please do so! :)

Saturday, 26 February 2011

Bit of a sticky wicket

Well being the awesome sister that I am I decided to help out my little sis in raising money for her geography camp, so I missioned out the 45 minute drive to the most beautiful winery on the planet. Mount Shadforth wines. B-E-A-utiful. Anyway we grapepicked from 7:30 til 12 then got the hell outta there. I managed to cut my hand twice, SAME FREAKING FINGER! The first time I got driven down to the wine cellar to have it all bandaided up for me :)

Then we had to get out, it was hot and that makes your fingers sticky and stuff. And it's kinda gross really, lots of mouldy dried up grapes and stuff.

I met some cool people though, a dude called Bryn from Denmark and blonde haired guy and nice knickers dude. We meant to get pics, Jasmine got one, I'll get her to send me the pic so I can show you all how beautiful this winery is :)

Friday, 25 February 2011

And it was DHU time we got a good fush!

My lover of sorts took his boat out this Friday and came home with this beautiful DhuFish :) I'm definately looking forward to cooking up this beauty :)

Purple People Eaters

So this morning, as hungover as I've possibly ever been I drove a half hour to Narrikup to pick up the lil' sis then a couple hours to Manjimup to source out a b-e-a-uty of a dress for her ball :) It's purple and perrrty damn hot if I may say so meself, not our first choice but when the first choice doesn't fit whattaya gonna do?

Beauty eh?

Thursday, 24 February 2011

And so the day remains relatively pain free...

Well bummer on top of bummer - there shall be no bellybutton piercing today! My beautiful pink little bar hasn't arrived so it looks like we'll be waiting until next week for that one.

Bugger on shitballs really.

Here's the website of the place that is going to stick holes in me -

It's pretty awesome!!

Shagworthy Shan Style

Here is a couple of pics of last Friday just to let you know the kind of stuff that you will be in store for ;)

Thank F*ck It's Friday!!

Well it's Friday and I'm terribly sorry to anounce no writings from hockey last night, but my social butterfly couldn't be tamed and catching up with people is admittedly awesome :)

So it's Friday and another night down the pub is definately in store! Pre-gaming with fruit tingles and pubbing it with our Benneth! Hah what could be better?

So one more 8 hour work day to slog through - with a bellybutton piercing at 12! - and then a night of fun fun fun down at the P - U of B!

Thank Fuck it's Friday

Hockey Thursday

I'm taking my yellow pad and binder to hockey tonight so don't worry lovies, I'll come back with a ripe juicy piece of rambling to post later on tonight :)

Wednesday, 23 February 2011

Love and be Loved

To love is something
To be loved is something
But to love and be loved in return is everything.

Mr. Woodward once told me this. And it stuck.

Fairy Floss and Candycanes

If you could imagine heaven as anything what would you pick?

My niece used to tell me that heaven was where you lived on marshmellow clouds that you could eat, and that you got to drink Fanta. I think this came from us telling her that heaven is whatever you want it to be.

So it got me to thinking, what would I choose if I could select my heaven? And weirdly it is a hard question to answer because really, I'd just want to be happy all the time - wouldn't you? But it's hard to pick something that you know will make you happy - what if it doesn't?

So what would you pick if you could pick your own heaven? Marshmellows and Fanta?

Hockey Thursday

So it's Thursday and you all know what that means - Hockey day. The scent of pungent male BO unavoidable in the gym, at maximum capacity.

Oddly, I'm much more enthused about the upcoming food shop tonight rather than the sweaty men and squeaky floors. Probably has something to do with the fact that I am starving my guts out. Never go food shopping when you're hungry, it always costs 50% more when you are hungry. I can vouch for that.

So another day at the office and I'm wondering if I should even be posting this at all.

Just a thought, what is your opinion on cl*t piercings? I had a discussion today with a woman who said that she imagined it would be difficult to work with. 'Imagine a pair of tight jeans, you'd just be getting off all the time' she said. I mean personally a piercing down there wouldn't do it for me I imagine, but would this be the case? Anybody out there know from experience?

Tuesday, 22 February 2011

A Small Cat is Making More Small Cats

My little kitten can't be 6 months old and I swear to god she's pregnant. All I can think is oh my freaking god no! It's not fair, it's like a 6 year old kid getting pregnant, it just isn't fair! Her belly is huge and hard and HUGE and hard and I'm scared for her, she's a little sweetie, I don't want her having to go through all that pain - and then what are we going to do with her babies?? Take them to the pet shop? Yeah well that sure isn't going to help. Maybe the vet can abort them? No that'd be wayy too expensive for my budget especially as I want her to get all fixed up.

What can I do what can I do?

She's so little and tiny and full of life, she's not ready to be a mum - no way she's too little, she's a baby. Gakjsf;alkdvja;dkfjhadkgjhdsfigafdglkjafdg;lkjfafkjgagf

And then the amazing tattooed man made love to me

Like I said. Sex and the city is weird.

This dude 'Mr. Pussy' is making out with this fig in front of Charlotte in the middle of a resturaunt to bring the conversation back to his 'dining in' skills.

And Carrie has this stupid idea that all dudes are freaks. She actually is retarded - like totally and completely retarded and I want to smack her across the face, and yet I can't look away. God it's so awkward I wanna cry. Then punch her in the face.

The Black Book

You were my best friend
Or at least I thought you were
But the day my light came crashing down
You were the one that did the hurt

A simple pad
A simple list
On which names were placed
How could this pain
That cuts so deep
Be because of haste

Do you care to consider
That I thought you were my mate
Or doesn't it really matter
Until it's all too late

But I won't tell you the hurt
That wrenches my poor heart
I'll just have to let this friendship
All fall apart

The Rose

The petal falls softly to the ground
Joining brothers, lying all around
It dries slowly, soaking in the sun
It's sweet smell is lost only to one
The one who does not appreciate
The inside beauty until it's too late
But when they finally realise
What they've missed with ignorant eyes
It is much too late to repairs
The damage unwittingly caused there
We can only hope that they
Will encourage others not to be this way...

Well I Still Have a Kitchen

Poached eggs - not as disgusting as regular eggs. This however has limits, one or two is fine, three or more is positively gag reflex inducing. Glack.

Cooking poached eggs - as difficult as cutting your tornails with an anglegrinder withoutout arms. Oh my god I had one out of 7 that looked ok.

So with a bit of salt and pepper they weren't too bad. But they were icky after two, like I said, but I'm gonna keep practising coz they are fun to watch cook :) And mum is always giving me eggs so if I find an egg dish that I like then I'm gonna utilise it :)

Poached What?

Today I'm attempting to make poached eggs, I've never done it, seen it done or been remotely interested in it before and now that I'm home alone I plan on trying it. I hate eggs see, but people tell me poached eggs are scrumptious, so 11 eggs and a google search later - I'm going to do it. Check in and see if I still have a kitchen standing.

Sex and the Stupid

Sex and the city is honest to god the stupidest show on television. I love it - but it's fucking stupid. Honestly, like how Carrie is freaking out coz Big won't sleep with her three nights in a row so she perves on her frisky neighbours that are banging like jackrabbits next door. Not only would you not sit and watch a horny couple get it off - you sure as hell wouldn't invite three of your mates over to watch it with you? Kinda odd eh?

Also when she is desperate to get some action from Big in the same episode and she puts herself all over him while he's trying to watch a game and she won't give in, I mean what a stupid bitch? Can't you tell when he doesn't wanna fuck you on the couch? Sorry kids. But oh my good god!

She is the dumbest bitch out.

Living Life Shagworthy Shan Style :)

Living life the only way it's worth it :) Shagworthy Shan and Jizzworthy Julz on a mission :D


So - my views on marriage? Mixed. For years and years I've blatantly claimed to never ever ever get married. I mean yeah sure live with a man all your life and monogamy? That I am indeed all for. However now people around me are getting married and it seems wonderful - the idea of getting swept away by the fairtyale idea of a day when you are the princess. Also, there is the feeling of being wanted by a man - or woman - that wants to you be with them for the rest of their lives. It is an extremely tempting idea!

However I still quote 'I am never getting married' when around girls discussing the dream. Many are shocked and ask why and I suppose the real reason is because I don't want to get caught up in the idea of a WEDDING and forget that their is a MARRIAGE behind it all.

I want to get married someday because I don't want to live the rest of my life without that person, not because I want a beautiful day where I'm the queen - that's just the bonus. I mean if I spend 10 years of my life with a man and I feel that I don't ever want to live without him, sure I'd be keen. If I could see a better life for me without that person, or even a life at all without that person then there'd be doubts creeping up in my mind. I do not want to get married for a wedding!

Am I just a sick twisted cynical woman that doesn't have a forever heart? And of course stemming from this I have a view on never ever ever sharing finances with a man - but even more than that - I don't want to ever be financially dependant on a man, ever! When I have babies - sorry, IF I have babies, I don't want to be the mum that lives of the blokes salary, I'd have money saved or I'd have paid maternity leave and then go back to work as soon as possible. Just the way it is.

Am I a heartless bitch?

A Need for Food!

I need to cook something Delicious. I am ravenously hungry and want something that when I sink my teeth into it will provide something close to an orgasmic experience. Please help me out.

Love - an extremely fond lover of food.

Sites of Interest

I thought I'd put some sights up that I am in love with - why not share the love eh? - I love this site, all of the thing they sell are exquisitely beautiful without exception, everything took time and care. This site is perfect if you want to witness the beautiful. - I love this site simply for it's hilarity. It takes the motivational posters you see in offices around the work (Courage, Respect, Perseverance) etc. etc. and makes a regular photo hilarious. - Ok so this site is a news site, but it is the homepage at work and it's the best for catching up on all the breaking news in Australia that way when I watch television I don't have to watch the news with commercials and boring stories on the singing budgie that can waterski or whatever else. It's great :) - This blog is by a girl I met on facebook through a photography competition, since friending her I am in awe of her work and I highly recommend checking out her blog. She has her own business - EmmaJaneCouture and she is extremely talented and insightful - check her out :)


Is addiction just as excuse for not giving something up? I supposed in scientific cases where it has been proved that people experience withdrawal symptoms etc. then I guess it does exist. However I used to think I was an addicted passive smoker - I loved the smell of cigarettes because my mum smoked them my whole life, to tell you the truth I still do like the smell. But saying I'm an addicted passive smoker was just ridiculous - and I think this is the case in a lot of scenarios where people just don't want to give something up. *Ahem* Sex addiction anyone? Yeah well we all know porn can be interesting but addictive?

It seems that sex addiction is the new Hollywood craze and it's not one that I can say I am a-jumping on the bandwagon for at that. As far as I'm concerned what could we possibly be addicted to that drives us to have sex with those other than our partners and thus commit adultery? Hormones? Endorphins?  I am hard pressed to believe that there is anything within our body that we can be addicted to full stop. Honestly - I think sex addiction is just an excuse for men to fall back on when they can't man up and admit to being the lying scumbag of a weakling that they are to cheat on their women like that. And sex addiction clinics? Just another way to make money in this growing material world we find ourselves in - provides a source of 'credibility' to men's claims that they are 'addicted' to sex. Bollocks and bullshit I say.

Boxer Please

I want a boxer. A dog not Danny Green or anything geez. I want a boxer - a red boy and I want one so bad a puppy but I can't afford one just yet - they're $2000 a pop well from the kennels I want one from they are anyway. Plus it'll cost me a few thousand dollars to transport it from QLD over to the ol' double U of A. Also I'm having issues convincing lover to let me have one. I want one so bad. So badly in fact that I've contacted about 8 breeders and asked to be on their waiting lists, explaining I'll be interested in purchasing a pup in a couple year's time.

Any of you interested in donating an adorable boxer pup to me? Shipping included? Nah, didn't think so :) Worth a try eh cyberspace?

Global Warming? The End of the World Perhaps?

With all the recent disasters it kind of gets me thinking if global warming is more advanced than we'd first feared. Perhaps the theatrical depiction of the end of the world in the film 2012 wasn't so far from the truth. Really I mean think about it - here are the facts

  • December 2010-January 2011 - Queensland Floods
  • January 2011 - Carnarvon Floods Western Australia
  • February 2011 - Perth Bushfire
  • February 2011 - Christchurch Earthquake
  • February 2011 - Cyclone Yasi in Queensland
  • February 2011 - Cyclone Bianca in Southern Western Australia
And these are just the natural disasters that I know of in Australia - and being Australian of course these are of the biggest concern to me - and Christchurch is in NZ which is a close little neighbour of ours. These natural disasters are all increasing in frequency and aren't typical to these areas of Australia which is what is most concerning - I mean I live in Southern WA and come on - we haven't even heard of a cyclone making it's way down here for, well, god knows how long! Next thing you know it'll be snowing. Ok yes we get bushfires in Perth a lot - but eh you get that.

Basically I am concerned, not being a skeptic I am alarmed at the number of natural disasters in and surrounding the country I know and love. Geez Louise.


I look at you
Do you know
What do i mean
Are you innocent
Or are you blind
Or do you see
I am confused,
Yet it is simple
The games you play
That strike deep
My life's a game
I look into your eyes,
I see cold
Only cold and hate
What do you see
When you look in mine
Fear, anxiety or qualm
Or just me
Only me

Trashy? Or kind of cool?

A mate of mine is opening his own store in town tattooing and piercing. I've wanted to get a tattoo for ages however this has been an extremely sensitive topic between my special life partner and myself and so I haven't taken the plunge. So instead I was thinking of getting my belly button pierced and lover seems all a go for that... anyway I have mixed feelings - I always thought that it was trashy but now as my best friend and roomate has one - it doesn't seem that way. I mean it doesn't make her trashy but seeing girls with them in at the beach in their kini is just wierd. I have a moral dilemma, maybe I'll get it pierced and if I don't like it I'll take it out - or I'll just take it out when people can see it at the beach and stuff. Friday is crunch time. My mate that owns the shop - Steve, he's already bought my belly jewellery - so I suppose that really my decision is made for me.

Coffee? Tea? Or Me?

Sweetie oh my sweetie
The dearest one to me
I have just one question
If you could hear my plea

Around this time of afternoon
My stamina grows weak
And I feel I need a boost
To handle the day's peak

So in this mighty quest
I require your company
For without you by my side
I just can't make coffee

So please acquiesce my dear
To my poor request
As coffee made with you
Is coffee at its best

Hockey Season

A short story summarising my typical Thursday night;

Never has a Thursday felt complete without the salty scent of sweat penetrating my nostrils at the conclusion of the day. The men's hockey team is like a second family to me - all the boys - Trev, Rodney, Wilksy, Dupey, Tom and of course Nic. Watching men lumber from one end of a polished hardwood floor to the other has never really appeared as my calling in life - however my week just doesn't seem fulfilled without missioning it the half hour drive to come see the boys play.

There's no gossiping, bitchiness or drama like there is on my girl's soccer team. It's just a bunch of blokes down here to play the game they love - if they play well the do and if they play shit - well. There'll always be the odd dispute between player and umpire but it wouldn't be the testosterone filled night I love without it. Whether it's Nic flicking a spectacular goal or Aaron attempting to perfect his overhead, the boys always please - even a full blown creaming will make for an entertaining match.

I love that I don't have to be girly. I don't have to talk about boys, breakups and the lastest rumor of who cheated on who. It's such a relief to get away from all of that. Today in particular there are two blokes I don't know the names of yet (although I'm sure I'll find out soon enough) that are whooping and cheering for my team like idiots, which of course is just making my night. Well from 4-2 at half time to 7-6 as the game is drawing to a close I'm starting to worry for my boys - Bring it HOME! Also - I'm not sure if I like the ump, but then again - do we ever?

A Need to Express

Well in this day and age, what person, especially of my generation can even go a day without expressing their opinion? What with the feelings I wish to express people would get sick of me pretty quick if I just blurted out whatever came into my head. And so here I am, signed up to a blog on the worldwideweb hoping to express what I can't get across to the people I love most. And hate most. I love writing poetry - so much so that I wrote a poem to my colleague and emailed it to her asking if she wanted to go out back and make a coffee with me - yes a 4 stanza poem requesting a coffee making buddy. I have also recently rediscovered my love of reading particularly crime and thriller however I do love a good girly read. Kathy Reichs is my most recent love.

So here I am, spilling my boring guts out for nobody to listen to but hey once it's in cyberspace it's there forever and I've had my little spill and ranted and raved and now I feel like I'm important to somebody. I mean hey that's the point of blogging eh? Even if you don't get famous like the 'Servantless Cooks' of America you can still feel like you've contributed to society in your own little way and you feel more wholesome and complete and all warm and fuzzy eh? Well I guess that's why I'm doing this, and no - believe it or not it doesn't make me feel pathetic when I write it like that I just think that it makes more sense to be honest about why I'm really doing this - oh yeah I want to be famous and earn lots of money but even if I don't end up there (and let's admit it - it sure ain't likely) this will make me feel better :) I will feel like I've contributed to some poor sod's life - ha! As if.